Yesterday I read this post and watched the interview with my friend Dr. Val Jones at Better Health and thought to myself, “Holy crap, I just thought my ass was fat. You mean, I’ve actually got a disease?!?!”

The solution should have been obvious, of course. So naturally, I sat down at the computer to start this blog.

I’ve been thinking about starting this project for, geez, way too long. Yes, sitting on my butt, thinking about it. Well, not always sitting and thinking. There have been plenty of times where I’ve actually been on the mat thinking about writing it. Plenty of poses and pondering over the last two years. But I’m declaring the new decade shall be one of Action! Will you join me?

I’ve realized for a long time that some of my most creative insights and ideas come precisely when I’m trying to clear my mind on the mat; when I’m inside out and upside down; when I’m trying to think of nothing – good things come to mind. Then I love yoga, and I want to jump up and work on my new ideas right then, but you’re “supposed to” stick with your practice…

So I stick to it for a while, and then when I’m trying to ignore my pain, my inflexibility and my lack of “progress”; when I’m trying not to compare myself with skinny yoga chicks, or trying not to laugh at sweaty yoga dudes; or just trying not to be a wimp and hold a pose for more than 2 freaking seconds without wanting to do something else; or when I’m trying not to reprimand myself for thinking un-yogic thoughts, well because you’re not “supposed to” think of stuff like that when you’re doing yoga… But I do. Then I feel bad. And I can’t concentrate. And then I think I suck. Then I hate yoga, and I quit. For a while.

And so it goes back and forth, off and on, yin and yang, sun and moon, love and hate…

But when I think about it, I guess I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with yoga. When I say “always” I bet it seems like an exaggeration to some of you, but we’re talking just shy of 40 years. ugh. That’s kind of depressing just writing that. So, wow! you say. How could you possibly be loving and hating yoga for that long?

Well, while the idea for this blog has been floating around in my head for a mere two years! or so, it was just last month, the week before my birthday, when NPR was telling me in the car, and CNN was showing me on television and Google was reminding me every goddamn day for a week that I was over 40 years old that I realized that I first started hating and loving yoga while waiting for Sesame Street to come on.

Back in the day,  Sesame Street was the only thing to watch in the afternoons. It came on at 5, followed by The Electric Company, at 6, then Zoom, then some crap PBS news show (hey, I was 7, and it wasn’t Walter Cronkite). In the early 70’s I was a little old for the direct Sesame Street demographic since I actually already knew my ABC’s and 123’s, but there was nothing else on, so I had to wait until 5 for anything kid related.

But as often as not, I’d turn on the TV a little early, and there she was, the original Tele-Yogini, Lilias! Yoga and You on PBS. I hated that she was the only thing between me and Ernie with a banana in his ear, but I loved doing the poses along with her.

Man, if only I’d known what a gift it was then to just effortlessly roll my feet back over my head (Plow Pose) or pick my own butt off the floor with my hands (Candle Pose). I also loved that big crazy braid. I had one just like it. She was the only grown-up I knew with a big crazy braid.

So there you go. I’ve been loving and hating this yoga thing for a long, looonnng time. But in the spirit of New Year’s Resolutions or Yogic Intentions or whatever your thing is, here’s wishing that in 2010, this irreverent look at yoga, movement, humor and fitness gets at least one of us moving more and laughing more on a regular basis, and hoping that new technologies can help dig us out of the hole that we’ve let ourselves fall into.

By the way, I did take a break while I was writing this and did 10 minutes of Sun Salutations, a couple Triangles, and some twists. What did you do today?

This entry was posted on Thursday, December 31st, 2009 at 6:29 am and is filed under Blogging, Fitness, Health, Technology, Yoga. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.